It's been about 3 weeks since the last post. I don't like to post when I feel sad or mad. You can read what you want into that :)
I have had to overcome some serious negative feelings - anger, sadness, depression and on and on. I feel blessed to have finally been able to move past this round of those feelings. I'm not going to say that those kind of feelings are gone forever because I seem to have to deal with those feelings every time something happens to Lizzie - so much for stability in this household.
(Lizzie at a family party)
Things are so good. Lizzie is doing awesome! She is still very fatigued, but her energy is higher than we've seen post surgery and she seems to want to engage more in life every day. That has been such a hard thing to watch - everyone around her playing or having fun, but she having no interest at all in participating with them. We're so glad she is improving. Her personality comes back little bits at a time and she is so funny. She is becoming more and more talkative and sometimes almost talks people's ears off - we're glad she's becoming more social because she has been very quiet and isolated since surgery.
(Lizzie talking Great-Ma's ear off - "and do you know what Grandma, and guess what Grandma")
Her short term memory seems worse since the last surgery so we're hoping that will improve, but it makes for some funny moments. We went to a movie this week and an hour later she couldn't remember who Spencer's friend was that came with us. I tried and tried to jog her memory, but she literally had no recollection who came. Her left-sided weakness and paralysis are definitely improving...I'm sure this has a lot to do with the pressure and fluid that was removed in this last surgery.Right before Lizzie's first surgery I had gone to Park City to do a major shopping trip with my sister. I had bought almost everything that Liz would need for the fall at school. Today we got out all those clothes and out of 25 or so items there are 5 that will still work. I thought I'd be all weepy and depressed about this, but I'm not. I'm so glad that acceptance of what we're dealing with is coming because fighting your situation just does not help anyone. I feel like I've had to turn Lizzie's body over to the Lord - He is the only one that can help us figure out her condition and help us know what to do. Things are so much better when I just let Him be in charge-letting go of control is so hard, but then once it's done, it's so much better.
(Calli, being Calli)
We are still pretty busy with appointments, but Lizzie is working harder in therapy and is more willing to try new things. This may sound really weird, but we have been taking her to a woman who is a master herbalist and does energy work and lots of other unconventional things. Ben thinks the whole thing is a bit black magic, but when the MD's say they can't do anything else about hunger and other issues, you start looking elsewhere for help. Anyhow, I really believe that this lady is helping Lizzie so much - I don't know how this type of thing works, but it seems to be working for Lizzie. She is taking some supplements and the lady works wonders...if anyone wants her info, I'd love to share.The other kids are doing well - we're trying to do some fun things, but haven't done much this summer besides trips to the doctor. We have a trip planned in August for Bear Lake and we're all looking forward to that - we just all crave normalcy and it is slowly coming back again.
(Me and my Calamity Jane who won't smile for pictures unless we're really lucky)
We seem to be reminded over and over again that the Lord is aware of us. One cool experience I had is on one particularly bad/sad day, the Lord seemed to send out an SOS to people around me. One friend came and got all my ironing and did it - she said she was in the temple and kept thinking of me and felt like she needed to do something to help me. My sister came over that same day to clean my house - she said she had been reading her scriptures and I kept coming to her mind. It was a strong testimony to me that when we are doing the right things and in the right places, we will be inspired as to what the Lord would have us do and know who He would have us help. I want and need to do more of that.
4 comments:
I'm a big believer in the voodoo (herbal/alternative) solutions, especially when western med. leaves us out of options. I was feeling the funk too for a while, I'm glad you are doing better. It's sometimes a full time job to work through all the emotions of a health crisis. I'd loan you my dog to lick your tears, but since your allergic it wouldn't be too helpful :-) I hope the rest of your summer is bliss!
p.s. You look beautiful! So glad you left proof in your post!
:-)
Yes, you do look beautiful! I am so glad to hear that things are going better. We miss you guys and need to find a time to get together. Ted and I have been going to these ladies in Logan that read your eyes and then use kinesiolgy (sp?) to find what herbs you need. People think we are crazy, but we have found that it is helping with everything from sinus issues to energy levels. I think our bodies can benefit from a balance between natural remedies AND official dr.'s. Can't wait to get together!
Robin
Carol your hair is beautiful. Just wanted to start with that. Secondly, it is so nice when people are able to notice their blessings and that others are able to sense when they are needed and can act on that. Third, I am a huge fan of "alternative" healing methods. There is a time and a place for Western medicine, but there is certainly a time and a place for the Eastern medicine or holistic medicine. I have even gone to a Physical Therapist who really was able to blend the two into one amazing therapy session. I'm so glad to hear you little is doing better and better. :D
Thanks for sharing that last experience about doing the right things and being in the right places. I needed that reminder. I LOVE having Lizzie in my primary class. And I'm surprised to hear that she has been a little quiet cuz she always has a story to share in class. :)
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